How and When to Start
When Cillian was around seventeen months old, we decided to start introducing him slowly to the potty. He already journeyed with my husband and me to the bathroom and would be very nosy and a little…um…handsy… so we figured it was a good time to start potty training.
Here is our detailed account of how we potty trained out 18 month old before he turned 2!
Things You Need to Potty Train
I try to be minimalistic and do not like clutter so my first thought was, “Why do I need another potty in my house when I already have two? It is not like C is going to go on his own anytime soon!” But the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to teach by example, and the easiest way to do this was to buy Cillian a separate potty to put in the bathroom with the big potty. I stumbled upon the cutest tiny toilet on Amazon, complete with flushing sound effects and my inner Cutesy won over my inner Minimalist. I set his miniature right in front of the full-size version.
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Our Method
We started with sitting on the potty every time we did a diaper change and before each bath, not necessarily to get him to use the potty, but just to get him used to sitting on it when mom tells him to. Of course, he always pointed to the larger toilet and insisted I sit with him. And sitting was all he ever did. His obedience can be quite literal at times. I say sit, and he sits then gets up and leaves but, hey, at least he sat.
To encourage C to sit longer and perhaps actually use the toilet, I began giving him books or toys to entertain him while he sat. We also used bribery, a staple of the Mom Game. Every time he peed in the potty, even a single drop, he got one M&M. Soon, he was excitedly running to the potty when I asked him to, shouting, “Ca Cat!” (translated: chocolate).
Keep It Positive
Around eighteen months, Cillian’s interest and ability to use the potty really took off. He was still in diapers full time and I did not consider myself to be potty training but rather potty practicing. When it was time for a diaper change, I would encourage him to sit on the potty and, usually thanks to the promise of chocolate, he would go. But there were also times when he would drop what he was doing and run to the bathroom door telling me he needed to go. If his diaper was dry, I made sure to tell him and to celebrate that all his peepee went in the potty!
I think the biggest encouraging factor was my ridiculous excitement over peeing in the potty and a dry diaper, and the promise of chocolate for every pee. I even made sure to tell C to go tell his dad so they could celebrate too.
Remain Patient
We hit a slight halt on the potty training for around twenty months. C just did not want to go anymore. This was right around the time we moved, and I was not surprised by the setback. He would have a meltdown anytime we suggested he go potty and would play the go limp game when we carried him in there. He hated it! In an attempt not to traumatize him, we made like Elsa and let it go. For a while. We knew he would get it when he was ready. And when he turned two and was moved into the two-year-old class at school, he started to catch on to how things were going to be.
Enlist Help
His new teacher seems to be the potty-training master. She admits that she does not like to change diapers and begins potty training at school as soon as the parents are on board! And we were onboard! Once Cillian had adjusted to his new class, we began sending him to school in his undies. Well, in clothes too, but no diapers! Every forty-five minutes, his teacher would take him to use the bathroom. Children seem to catch on more quickly (to the good and the bad) when they see other children doing the same, and C caught on!
Be Consistent
At home, we followed the same forty-five-minute schedule. We would intermittently ask C if he needed to go just to help him understand how to communicate about going potty. We tried never to pester or bother him too much as we did not want going potty to be seen as something that interrupted his play. That’s just a drag. We also did not let him sit on the couch or our bed unless he had just been potty.
Now, at twenty-six months (yes, I had to stop and count), C only wears our cloth diapers at night. I would like to say this gives me less laundry to do but it does not. C has accident-free days and other days where we run out of clean pants. The most challenging thing for C is learning to differentiate between, “I need to go potty.” and “I just went potty. In my pants.”
Stay Calm
When C does have an accident at home, or at school, we do not punish or shame him to make him feel bad. We just explain to him what happened and what he should do next time and we expect him to help clean himself and his mess up. I have said it before, toddlers are amazing creatures and they understand much more than we give them credit for.
As much as I indented to do the three-day-method of potty training, that did not seem to fit into my schedule. I did not have the time and attention to spend three days at home with my bottom-half-naked toddler cleaning up accidents. Introducing the process slowly and having patience seemed to work much better for us! Even outings are now diaper free! I just make sure to never go anywhere without a change of clothes or two and a wet bag to contain it all.
Oh, and the M&M’s.
They are the real MVP. They are usually enough to convince C to go potty when we feel it is time, even if we are out and about. The other day this kid went potty no less than five times between his bath time and bedtime because he knew he would get an M&M each time. Already gaming the system. I guess I am proud?
Celebrate the wins!
My proudest moment by far was the very first time Cillian dropped was he was doing without an explanation, ran to the bathroom, dropped his pants, and did his business before we even knew what was going on and then waddled out with his pants and undies around his ankles demanding an M&M. That feels like a breakthrough!
My advice is just to be patient. Find the time and method that works for you and your Little and don’t worry if you have to switch methods multiple times. Just expect that it will be a slow process and remember that all children’s clothes can be easily washed. Also, do not let anyone else tell you that your kid is too young to learn or that it is high time he gets out of diapers. Unless they are offering to do the potty training for you, politely tell them to shove off.
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